Heres the deal....
When a dude pursues a female he usually sees her out in public and how she interacts with others in society. So like any animal ; p the gentleman pursues the woman, whether hes attracted to her appearance or charm there is some form of attraction and there is something he sees in her he wants so from this day forth he courts her....
Ok so depending on the dude, him and the female may go on dates or spend time together doing something interesting so that they may both get to know each other, but most dudes dont really try to get to KNOW the lady they do just enough to get by. Most women are complete suckas for attention so the simplest of the gentlemans attempts win the woman over. During this time he realizes there are some definite pros and a few cons when it comes to his new beau.
As time goes on, the woman becomes more and more used to the guy, and the guy, whether hes commited to being her guy or not believes he can place stipulations on her, and since the lady is so interested in the guy, she allows him (this is like some vodoo ish I swear!!!). For instance, I like to go out A LOT ive dealt with guys who have had a problem with it so to be kind I slowed down or went out of town to make it seem like I wasnt going out, they were none the wiser. And by doing so I gave him, sort of what he wanted, to make him happy, to shut him up. However, it is at this point that the problem occurs.
So now, the dude figures he has the female where he wants her to be, doing what he wants her to do, and he is content. However, that spunky, happy, fun filled, good looking woman is not the same person that the dude met, she has changed or rather they way the guy looks at her has changed. So now he goes out, meets other girls, and/or continues to talk to the same old ones, looking for something he already has and probably has had before but to no avail he can not find it. Why is this? Because men are the ones who... changed the dynamics of the relationship. As much as women want to change men, or at least be responsible for them changing, they cant so eventually they give up. But dudes try to change women and women let them or at least the women lead them to believe that they have changed.
Ok now, the relationship/situatuion is over. The girl is back to her old self, looking good, and maybe the dude sees her out at the club or he thinks about her and he calls her, the lady is completely over any offerings the gentleman has for her because everything he is now so willing to do, she was doing for him before but he didnt realize what he had. So now we have the classic tale of where the script is flipped. The dude might hear another dude has intentions to pursue the lady and now he thinks "hey thats my old chick, I can get her back with no problem" but what he doesnt remember is that he let her go and when he did that she left and so did any intentions of them ever being anything more.
Why do I know this story so well? Because the majority of my closest friends are females and Ive seen it happen to them and most importantly Ive been through it. And what I learned from it is there are going to be kinks and youve got to work them out, if it is meant to be it will be and you should never feel like you have to change someone, or change yourself for someone, they liked everything about you when they met you whether they realized it or not...
Thanks for reading...
